Thursday, May 2, 2013

I'm an Intactivist and I'm sorry. (I swear I'm not a Jerk).

It has come to my realization over the last few months how I managed to hurt so many feelings at the beginning of my journey in "intactivism" (I prefer genital integrity activism). It took me a LONG time to understand why I lost so many friends and alienated myself from certain parenting groups in the beginning.

My Shrimpie is intact because I couldn't find a reason compelling enough to have him circumcised. It wasn't until after he was born that I began to stumble across information that made me ever so glad that I listened to my gut.

I began to share this information. I thought *surely* others would want to see it too! I really thought EVERY mother and father would want to know that circumcision is NOT necessary and, in fact, harmful.
I truly thought that every single person provided with this information would go, "Oh my gosh. Let's stop this!"

I have no idea who to credit this photo for. If it's yours, tell me.
But come on. It's perfect. 
But I was wrong. I honestly had NO idea that RIC was such a controversial topic in the parenting world (I know, naive). I never had the intention of trying to make someone feel guilty or shamed or whatever. Ever. EVER.

I do admit to getting angry and frustrated when people just didn't "get it". I couldn't understand why they wouldn't or didn't. It took some time before I began to understand the power cultural normalcy has on a person. The power guilt can have on a mother. The power pride can have on a father.

I do feel that my approach to talking about RIC is gentle. When people still get angry with me, I just have to let it roll off my back. I know I have saved several baby boys with my brand of advocacy so I won't be changing my methods. And those boys were worth all the angry words from others who think I am wrong.

But perhaps I owe an apology to people I hurt in the beginning, before I really understood the beast I was dealing with. I doubt just about anyone I'm thinking of will ever see this and that's okay. I'm just sending it out into the universe. I'm sorry to anyone I hurt on my journey to becoming the advocate I am now.

All that said. I still don't get it. Why doesn't *everyone* WANT this information?


1 comment:

  1. I feel like you are writing about my journey into intactivism! I was also naive, assuming everyone would want to end RIC if they had the right info but I was wrong. I also feel that the several boys I saved from being circumcised was well worth it all.